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Kristen Schaal Quotes

Total quotes: 16
“It's ok. Sarah Lynn, you are calm, you are thin. Your skin is so soft it's like you murdered a baby and stole its skin. Your skin is murdered baby soft.”
— Sarah Lynn (voice), BoJack Horseman, BoJack Horseman Season 3: That's Too Much, Man!
Tagged: Mantra
“Felix: What do you want?


Louise: A lot of things, Felix, but right now I want money for a dog.



Felix: You owe money to a dog?”
— Louise Belcher (voice), Bob's Burgers, Season 8: Brunchsquatch
Tagged: wishes, Wish List, Money, dog, Misheard
“Mr. Frond: So, you're in trouble again.

Louise: Drink some cranberry juice.


Mr. Frond: What? No, not ‘urine trouble!’ You are in trouble.”
— Louise Belcher (voice), Bob's Burgers, Season 6: The Cook, the Steve, the Gayle, & Her Lover
Tagged: Puns, Misheard, Cranberry Juice, Urine
“Can we roll down the windows? I'm starting to breathe in Tina's breath.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Family Fracas
Tagged: bad breath
“Remember, Tina—a nerd in the hand is worth...not really that much. Never mind.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Two for Tina
Tagged: Puns, Bird in the Hand, Nerds
“I made it rain shrimp! What did you ever do?”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Lindapendent Woman
Tagged: Raining Shrimp, Humblebragging
“Linda: Don't you talk to me like that, Miss Smart-mouth! You just bought yourself a ticket to your room!


Louise: [storming off] Oh, fine! Best money I ever spent! You can't ruin anything in there!”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Mother Daughter Laser Razor
Tagged: Grounded, Smart Mouth
“Louise: Speaking of Christmas, here is my annual list of demands.

Bob: ‘My own apartment.’

Louise: And it cannot be a studio. You have exactly seven shopping days to comply. If it rolls into day eight, there will be tears and violence.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: Bob Rest Ye Merry Gentle-Mannequins
Tagged: List of Demands, Christmas List, Studio Apartment, Threats, Tears, Violence
“Puberty, puberty, puberty. That's all I hear when you guys talk!”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: The Unbearable Like-Likeness of Gene
Tagged: Puberty, hormones
“We're adrenaline junkies. We like our rides pure, uncut, and assembled in Meh-hi-co!”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 3: The Deepening
Tagged: Adrenaline, Meh-hi-co, Junkies
“Your room looks like it was decorated by a perverted jockey.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Spaghetti Western and Meatballs
Tagged: Interior Decoration, Perverted Jockey
“I hope they're using protection because I am not taking care of that baby.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Crawl Space
Tagged: birth control, Contraception
“Louise: Hello and welcome to Bob's Burgers. The burger of the day is the 'Child Molester'—it comes with candy. Get it?


Hugo: [clicks teeth] Yes.



Ron: No.



Louise: Because sometimes they use candy to lure their victims...



Hugo: YES! WE GET IT!”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Human Flesh
Tagged: Child Molestation, Candy From Strangers
“Teddy: I love bed and breakfasts. They're so quaint. 

Louise: Aren't they? Random strangers, shedding skin cells all over the house...”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Bed & Breakfast
Tagged: Bed and Breakfasts, Gross Humans
“Randy: Do you think cows should be ground up for food? 

Louise: Personally I don't really care but my father, he loves grinding them up; it gives him a rush. Daddy's a bad, bad man.”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Sacred Cow
Tagged: Making Meat
“Hello and welcome to Bob's Burgers. The burger of the day is the 'Child Molester' —it comes with candy. Get it?”
— Louise Belcher, Bob's Burgers, Season 1: Human Flesh
Tagged: Pedophile, Molestation
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