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Mac Quotes

Total quotes: 30
“Thorny: [finishes syrup, slams bottle on table] I am all that is, man!

[Rabbit struggles to finish]

Mac: What’s a-matter Rabbit, your mother teach you to chug?”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: chugging, Syrup
“Captain O’Hagan: Did you guys put in for any transfers yet?

Mac: I applied for a guard job—at the post office.

[collective groan]

Thorny: Hey, you’ll finally be able to shoot someone.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: Going Postal, shooting
“Farva: Don’t call me radio, unit 91.

Mac: Then don’t call me unit 91, radio.

Farva: Are you done?”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: radio
“Captain O’Hagan: What did you find out at the weigh station?

Mac: My cruiser weighs 16,000 kilograms!”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: weigh station, kilograms, cruiser
“Mac: How’s your shooting, Thorny?

Thorny: Good. I’ve been dead on all morning.

Mac: What about that little guy?

[points to a bullet hole in the shooting target’s neck]

Thorny: Who, that little guy? I wouldn’t worry about that little guy.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: shooting, Understatement
“No, Farva, you are under arrest for being a complete and total fuckhead.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: you're under arrest, fuckhead
“You boys like Mex-i-co? Yee-haww!”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: Mexico, yee-haw
“Captain O'Hagan: What's the significance of this John Chimpo fella?

Foster: You know those really cheap Japanese cartoons? No? This is basically a cheaper, Afghani knockoff. It's this monkey that basically travels around the world, doing nasty things. His butler tries to keep him in line, but, uh... no.

Rabbit: It's really funny, Cap. It's Afghanistanimation!

Captain O'Hagan: The monkey has a butler? Great. Is that what they do in Arabia, Thorny?

Thorny: How the hell should I know? [In a silly voice with his eyes crossed]

Mac: Do we look like the two dumbest guys in the world to you?”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: Monkey, afghani, dumbest
“[Chugging maple syrup] Three...two...one...DO EET. Oh, go, girlfriend.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: chugging, Do It, maple syrup
“[Mac gets shot in the crotch while wearing the steel cup ]
Foster: How you feelin' there, Mac?

Mac: Good enough...to fuck...your mother.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: fuck your mother
“Mac: Oh, c'mon, we're like the sons you never had.

Captain O'Hagan: If you were my son, Mac, I would've smothered you by now.

Mac: Smothered me in gravy, you big dirty man.”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: Sons, dirty, gravy
“Mac: But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun!

Thorny: [referring to Farva] Yeah, and his shenanigans are cruel and tragic.

Foster: [after a pause] Which... makes them not really shenanigans at all.

Mac: [in a silly voice] Evil shenanigans!”
— Mac, Super Troopers
Tagged: shenanigans, cruel, tragic, Evil
“She said 'vagina.' A woman said 'vagina.'”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 9: The Gang Broke Dee
Tagged: Women, Vagina, Shock
“Frank: Hey, warm sun, cool ocean breezes, getting rip sh*t on ham.

Mac: Wouldn't you say we're getting... Hammered?”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 7: The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore
Tagged: Drinking, Hammered, Sun, Drunk
“Dennis: What's wrong with the Jersey Shore?

Mac: Come on, you've seen that TV show. It's just a bunch of sweaty Guidos getting hopped up on energy drinks and giving each other diseases.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 7: The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore
Tagged: Jersey Shore, Energy Drinks, Diseases
“People change, Frank. Look at me: I went from a tiny twink to the muscle-bound freak you see before you.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 7: Frank's Pretty Woman
Tagged: Change, Muscle, big, Freak
“Parenting is pretending you know what you're talking about, then jamming it down their throat!”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: Dee Gives Birth
Tagged: Parenting, Forceful, Teaching, Parenthood, Fake It Until Make It
“It's when you drink so much that everything goes brown. It's not as severe as a black out because I remember bits and pieces. I call it browning out.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: Who Got Dee Pregnant
Tagged: Black Out, Drinking, Drunk, Alcohol, Browning Out
“Mac: Hey bro, how'd you lose your hand?

Sailor: Diabetes.

Mac: That's not much of an adventure is it? Kind of tragic.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 6: The Gang Buys a Boat
Tagged: Diabetes, hand, tragic, Adventure
“I do not appreciate being paraphrased. I choose my words very deliberately.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The World Series Defense
Tagged: Words, Paraphrased, Deliberate
“Dee: Maybe you shouldn't have your window open!

Mac: maybe you shouldn't be throwing jars of piss out the window!”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 5: The Gang Hits the Road
Tagged: window, Piss, Gross, angry
“Dennis: Lay it on us, bud.

Mac: It involves us pulling up our bootstraps, oiling up a couple of asses, and doing a little plowing of our own. Not gay sex.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis
Tagged: gay, Sex, Euphomism, Hard Work
“Yeah! Yeah, that's the classic setup. You know this, no? Look, every great crew in history has followed that basic dynamic, right? Looks, brains, wildcard. Think about it! The A-team did it. Scooby Doo did it. The Ghostbusters did it!”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 4: The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis
Tagged: Team, Setup, Dynamic, looks, Brain, Wildcard
“Dee: I am not a failure!

Mac: Dennis, what is it that you call it when somebody tries to do something but doesn't succeed?

Dennis: Uh, that would in fact be a failure.”
— Mac, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Season 2: Charlie Goes America All Over Everybody's Ass
Tagged: Failure, Fail, Sassy, Diss
“Juno: I'm not ready to be a mom.

Mac: Damn skippy you're not! You don't even remember to give Liberty Bell her breathing meds.

Juno: God, that was *one* time! And she did not die, if you recall.”
— Juno, Mac, Juno
Tagged: humor, Family, Motherhood
“Mac: I'm not ready to be a pop-pop.

Bren: You're not going to be a pop-pop. Somebody else is going to find a precious blessing from Jesus in this garbage dump of a situation.”
— Mac, Bren, Juno
Tagged: Family, humor
“Mac: Where you been?

Juno: Oh, just out dealing with things way beyond my maturity level.”
— Juno, Mac, Juno
Tagged: humor, Family, maturity
“Juno: I'm just, like, losing my faith with humanity.

Mac: Can you can narrow that down for me?

Juno: I just wonder if like, two people can ever stay together for good.

Mac: You mean like couples?

Juno: Yeah, like people in love.

Mac: Are you having boy troubles? Because I gotta be honest with you; I don't much approve of dating in your condition, 'cause well... that's kind of messed up.”
— Juno, Mac, Juno
Tagged: humor, Family, humanity, Love, Couples
“In my opinion the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.”
— Mac, Juno
Tagged: Romantic Speeches, Love, romance, Good, Bad, ugly, Pretty
“In my opinion the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.”
— J.K Simmons, Juno
Tagged: Dating, Relationships, Movies
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