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Rachel Green Quotes

Total quotes: 18
“Rachel: Hey, just so you know: it's NOT that common, it DOESN’T ‘happen to every guy,’ and it IS a big deal!


Chandler: I KNEW it!”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 4: The One with the Jellyfish
Tagged: Impotence, erectile dysfunction
“Rachel: So basically you get your ya-yas from taking money from all of your friends?

Ross: Yeah.

Chandler: Yes, and I get my ya-yas from Ikea. You have to put them together yourself, but they cost a little less, so...”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 1: The One with all the Poker
Tagged: Ya-Yas, IKEA
“Rachel: Chandler wrote something about me on that paper and I want to see it!

Ross: Chandler, isn't that the short story you were writing?

Rachel: Short story? And I'm in it? I want to read it!

Ross, Joey, Chandler: NO!

Joey: Why don't you read it to her?

Chandler: It was summer... and it was hot. Rachel was there... A lonely grey couch…‘OH LOOK!’ cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The End.”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 2: The One with the List
Tagged: fairy tales, short stories
“Rachel: Guess what, guess what, guess what?!

Chandler: Um, OK. The fifth dentist caved and now they're ALL recommending Trident?”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 1: The One with all the Poker
Tagged: Dentists, Trident, Facetious
“Ross, hi. It's me. I just got back on the plane. And I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. It's just that I wasn't expecting to see you, and all of a sudden you're there and saying these things... And... And now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said, and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love you too. Because of course I do. I love you. I love you. I love you. What am I doing? I love you! Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get off this plane.”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 10: The Last One
“I got off the plane.”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 10: The Last One
“Just so you know, with us, it's never off the table.”
— Rachel Green, Friends, Friends Season 10: The One Where Joey Speaks French
Tagged: Dating, Love, The One
“Rachel: ‘Go tell him he’s cute, what’s the worst that could happen?’

Monica: ‘He could hear me.’”
— Rachel Green, Monica Geller, The One After The Superbowl
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Dating, Relationship, He's Cute
“Oh, I’m sorry. Did my back hurt your knife?”
— Rachel Green, The One With The Breast Milk
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Bad Luck, Bad Day, Backstabbing
“But today, it’s like there’s rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me.”
— Rachel Green, The One with Ross's New Girlfriend
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Bad Luck, Bad Day
“No uterus, no opinion.”
— Rachel Green, The One With The Secret Closet
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, uterus, Woman, Womanhood
“Rachel: ‘You idiot!’

Chandler: ‘I’m sure you’re right, but why?’”
— Chandler Bing, Rachel Green, The One With the Girl From Poughkeepsie
Tagged: Funny, Sarcasm, Jokes, Idiot
“Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming.”
— Rachel Green, The One With Phoebe's Cookies
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Parenting, Family
“Isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic.”
— Rachel Green, The One With Ross' New Girlfriend
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Dating, Sex
“Just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy, and it is a big deal!”
— Rachel Green, The One With The Jellyfish
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Dating, Sex
“Rachel: 'Hey, Mon, look, I’m melting butter.'

Monica: 'That’s great, Rach. You now have the cooking skills of a hot day.'”
— Rachel Green, Monica Geller, The One Where Ross Got High
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Monica, Cooking
“Oh, are you setting Ross up with someone? Does she have a wedding dress?”
— Rachel Green, The One With Ross's Teeth
Tagged: Rachel, Funny, humor, Dating, wedding
“How long do cats live? Like assuming you don’t throw ‘em under a bus or something?”
— Rachel Green, The One Where Ross Finds Out
Tagged: cats, humor, Funny, Friends, Rachel
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